Some Advice from Venerable Dao Ci – Part 2

Some elderly have very little or no energy for activities. How do we bring greater positivity into their lives or help them at this stage?

  • Advice: Encourage them to say one verse of any chant or mantra is good enough. And then if possible, increase the number of times of chanting per day.

When I am with a particular group of people, they tend to just gossip or make negative remarks or comments about the others, what should I do?

  • Advice: We should firstly not participate in those gossips and if possible, walk away. If the person starts asking why we are not responding or making any comments, it is then that we explain ourselves. One does not know the full history or details to judge the person or situation. So for ourselves, all the more we must not judge or look at the person as someone with faults and start labeling him or her. For all we know, the person may be one of the most filial son or daughter at home.

Although some virtuous friends are very hard working in their Lamrim study, they still face obstacles of great magnitude and also have difficulty in managing the relationships within the family. What can they do?

  • Advice: Family members may tend to take family relationships for granted precisely because it is a family relationship. The bonds have been there all this while and habitually, we are unable to control the way we communicate with each other. As disciples of Buddha, Master and Teacher, it is even more critical that we demonstrate and practice patience with them, and being grateful to them for giving us this chance to practice patience. At the same time, we must understand that as they have not learned the Dharma, we need to be even more compassionate towards them as they are not aware of their own faults. If we are not able to fully put the learning into actual practice yet, but are keenly aware of our own faults, that is already a marked improvement compared to others who could not even see their own faults. As we change ourselves and put the Dharma into practice, we will be able to influence the others indirectly. Once we are able to manage our family well, all the issues we face beyond our own family, be it at work or elsewhere, would be easy to handle.

By Leow Pei Shan (15G023E)

Here is the link to Part 1 – An Unusual Class Gathering ▶